Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize