Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
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