I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
