Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize