yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
We were destined to go to rehab together
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
