What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
You took a bar mat shot.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Randomize
