Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
