I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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