i just had sex bonerless
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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