omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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