You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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