I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
