I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize