ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Randomize
