no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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