No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize
