your room smells of hookers.
And success
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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