I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
COCAINE IS GR8
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Randomize
