So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
