Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
How's work?
Spinning.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
