so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Randomize
