cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
