why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Randomize
