Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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