Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
