I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
