I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
