yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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