508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
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