I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
