Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
