i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
