That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize