i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
she peed on how many people?
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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