Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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