Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
