I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Randomize
