I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
no you cant smoke seaweed
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
The dick lei will go down in squad history
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize
