Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Randomize