There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize