I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
