I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
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