well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Randomize