I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
