Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
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