In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
