apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
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