Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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