So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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