i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I could fuck to npr.
Randomize
